Sex in the City

What are the chances of a U.S. representative by the name of “Weiner” being caught for allegedly twittering a photo of his … ah, “wiener?” Couldn’t happen, right? It would have to be a creation of The Onion. But, it did happen, showing once again that our nation’s capital provides an endless supply of material that “trumps” fiction any day. It wouldn't have been so bad if the Congressman's name had been, say, Johnson.... oops, that doesn't work either....

Once asked where he got his material, syndicated Washington Post humorist Art Buchwald, all he had to do is read the morning paper, dash off his column, then head to lunch at the San Souci. With the treasure trove of material now available, he would have his column finished by breakfast.

For instance, there is Sarah Palin showing a little political “leg” on her bus tour, with the news media panting behind her, hoping she’ll show a little more, when all she’ll show is how dumb the news media is for treating her as a serious candidate. She’s not going to run; she’s having fun teasing the news media and making a bundle of dough with her Fox platform and side shows. If she ran, she would be fully exposed as an empty dress, as she was in the 2008 campaign.

Then, there is Mitt Romney, the one serious candidate to emerge thus far from the loyal opposition, who is impersonating Harry Houdini, contorting himself in an impossible effort to escape the signature accomplishment he had as Governor of Massachusetts – health care reform.

One thing you’ve got to give Rep. Weiner, though, is that we know he has – shall we say, the required physical manly equipment? But, I would suggest to him and to the other members of Congress that there’s a better way to show that one has “the right stuff” – and that is to have the proverbial balls to stand up and show a little political courage. And they wouldn’t have to twitter a crotch shot photo of that. It would be there for all to see and admire.

But, that will not likely happen and the failure of “members” of Congress and other politicians to do so is the greatest obscenity of all.

Gerald E. Lavey